He bought a donkey because he thought he might get a kick out of it.
In the winter my dog wears his coat, but in the summer he wears his coat and pants.
The chicken crossed the playground to get to the other slide.
The best way to stop a charging bull is to take away his credit card.
Comedians earn money for their cents of humor.
Notice outside the supermarket: Chicken soup is out of stock.
A thief attempted to steal paintings from the Louvre in Paris, but was caught 2 blocks away when his van ran out of gas. All the thief could say for himself was: “I had no MONET to buy DEGAS to make the VAN GOGH. But I tried for it anyway because I had nothing TOULOUSE!”
I’ve been reading something very interesting — Stephen Hawking’s latest book about anti-gravity.
I just can’t put it down.
I tried to come up with a pun about famous German philosophers, but I Kant.
Did you hear they found a narcissistic male lion whose females had turned on him?
Yeah. Course it was his pride that did him in.